PRINCIPLES OF CHANGE - How to Survive

Change is inevitable.  To survive in these times, you may have to reinvent yourself.  

A little self help-ish which is not normally my thing but a couple of good take-aways.

As freelancers, we must adapt to change as a matter of survival.  However, for many people, change is very frightening.  What I found important in this article is that something good usually follows the toughest changes.  This is a first in a series of nine by Ariane de Bonvoisin.

1st of Nine Principles

After interviewing people going through all types of change -- whether it be losing a job, divorce, a cancer diagnosis, becoming a new parent or starting a business -- I noticed that there were some very similar patterns, behaviors and attitudes among people who are good at change. Since change is the word of the year for all of us, it's my hope that this research will help you with whatever change you may be navigating.

I discovered nine principles I want to share. Each of my columns in the next few months will highlight one of them.

Principle 1: People who successfully navigate change have positive beliefs.

Your biggest need right now is to develop new beliefs about yourself, about the particular change you are facing now and about life in general. Nothing will have a bigger impact on the way you handle change. What you are saying to yourself, your inner dialogue, is your biggest enemy right now.

Responding to any of the changes you are going through right now first requires positive beliefs about change and life.

Three questions about change
I host a weekly video podcast called "Change Nation," where I talk to experts, authors and celebrities, and I always ask them the same three questions at the end to discover their paths through change.

First, what is the belief you go to in times of change? Answers I get include "This will pass," "Things work out in the end," "I will get through this," "I'm not alone," "I have faith." You, too, have an overarching belief that has gotten you through tough stuff in the past. What is it for you? Now is the time to find safety in that.

Second, finish the sentence: The best thing about change is ...

And finally, what is the best change you've ever made? Think back. What is extraordinary is that a big majority of my guests have said it was a hard change. Yes, their most beneficial changes were also their hardest: a divorce, getting through a loss, being laid off. The thousands who have gone through change successfully? They are all optimists. Something good followed their toughest changes.

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• Principle 2:  People who successfully navigate change know that change always brings something positive into their lives.

  Every change has a gift associated with it. While it’s natural to find change hard it’s important to remember that there are two sides to every coin and that something positive will always come. This is by far the most important belief to have during the first thirty days of change.

• Principle 3:  People who successfully navigate change know they are resilient, strong, and capable of getting through anything.

  You are much stronger, much smarter, and much more intuitive than you have ever been told. You are more resilient and more powerful. Once you truly know and believe this, you will be able to get through any change- even the hardest one you can imagine.

• • Principle 4:  People who successfully navigate change know that every challenging emotion they feel is not going to stop them and will guide them to positive emotions that help them feel better.

    Negative emotions can stall us, making change harder, while the positive ones can help us move through a change in a simpler, quicker, and more conscious way.

  • Principle 5:  People who successfully navigate change know that the quicker they accept the change, the less pain and hardship they will feel.

    Let go of the idea of how life should be.

  • Principle 6:  People who successfully navigate change use empowering questions and words, think better thoughts, and express their feelings.

    At your most stuck point, if you can speak with different words, think a slightly better thought, and get in touch with how you are feeling, you can become unstuck in a matter of minutes.

  • Principle 7:  People who successfully navigate change know they are connected to something bigger than themselves.

    When everything around you is changing, look for the part of you that doesn’t change. The part that is calm, centered and always there.

  • Principle 8:  People who successfully navigate change are not alone; they surround themselves with people who can help, who have the right beliefs and skills. And they create an environment that supports their change.

    One of our biggest flaws as human beings is that we keep thinking we are alone. Whatever the situation, there is always, always someone who can help.

  • Principle 9: People who successfully navigate change take action. They have a plan and know how to take care of themselves.

    Actions come in many forms. Some are big and obvious; some are so small you may think they are irrelevant. But any good action you take is a choice to move forward.